My heart bleeds.....

But it too shall pass.

The eternal question remains.....

あたし の花沢 類 がいるところ?

Without You....

Without You - RENT The Musical

Without you, the ground thaws
the rain falls
the grass grows

Without you, the seeds root
the flowers bloom
the children play

The stars gleam
the poets dream
the eagles fly
without you

The Earth turns
the sun burns
but I die, without you

Without you, the breeze warms
the girl smiles
the cloud moves

Without you, the tides change
the boys run
the oceans crash

The crowds roar
the days soar
the babies cry
without you

The moon glows
the river flows
but I die without you

The world revives
colors renew
but I know blue
only blue
lonely blue
willingly blue
Without you

Without you, the hand gropes
the ear hears
the pulse beats

Without you, the eyes gaze
the legs walk
the lungs breathe

The mind churns
the heart yearns
the tears dry without you

Life goes on
but I'm gone
'cause I die, without you
without you
without you
without you.....

Somebody Else

The other night, during a late night mamak session, a friend ased me this question a friend had asked him, that he had given quite serious thought about and found very interesting.

The question was - If you could be any man and any woman in the world right now, who would you be?

My friend then proceeded to launch into his narrowed down choices of who he'd want to be. My reaction? I was a tinge angry to be honest. I really have no idea why. Aside from why the heck would you ask this sort of question? And why the heck would I want to be anyone else but me??

I do realise of course, that I have been and have entertained such questions in the past. I just don't know why it irked me so much at this juncture. Perhaps there was a part of me which was insecure about being asked this, unconfident with what I was doing with my life or perhaps lack thereof. Or perhaps a part of me was reacting to some undistinguished spark of smugness or something I unknowingly am somehow most likely unjustifiably receiving from my financial analyst friend. I don't know.

But seriously, as I sat there, I just found myself thinking.....who else would I want to be but myself? I mean...not that my life is like super fantastic at the moment or anything but it was just like...my life. All the choices that I have made til this point have lead me here....and I'm absolutely happy with all of them. No regrets. This is who I am.

And really, it's just a question.....I mean people ask it all the time don't they? These hypethetical questions......who would you like to meet living or dead, etc. Right? Don't they?

I really have no idea why at that particular moment in time, and even to a certain extent right now, I find it rude. Goddess only knows why.......It still cheeses me off a bit....and really I don't think I have a reason to.

I mean it's just a hypethetical question.

Right?

Remember My Name, Fame!

Fame -Irene Cara



Baby look at me
And tell me what you see.
You ain't seen the best of me yet
Give me time, I'll make you forget the rest.
I got more in me, and you can set it free
I can catch the moon in my hand
Don't you know who I am?

Remember my name (Fame)
I'm gonna live forever
I'm gonna learn how to fly (High)
I feel it coming together
People will see me and die (Fame)
I'm gonna make it to heaven
Light up the sky like a flame (Fame)
I'm gonna live forever
Baby, remember my name
Remember, Remember, Remember, Remember,
Remember, Remember, Remember, Remember

Baby hold me tight
'Cause you can make it right.
You can shoot me straight to the top
Give me love and take all I got to give.
Baby I'll be tough
Too much is not enough, no
I can ride your heart till it breaks
You've got what it takes.

It's about the journey, Not the destination.

The Climb - Miley Cyrus



I can almost see it.
That dream I'm dreaming, but
There's a voice inside my head saying
You'll never reach it
Every step I'm takin'
Every move I make
Feels lost with no direction,
My faith is shakin'
But I gotta keep tryin'
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down, but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it, but
These are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most
I've just gotta keep goin', and
I gotta be strong
Just keep pushing on, but

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose
Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waitin' on the other side
It's the climb

Keep on movin'
Keep climbin'
Keep faith baby
It's all about, it's all about
The climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith, woah

Note to self.....

Note to self.......try not to reject his invitation next time........

if there is a next time.......oh woe is me.....

but he always has crap timing!!

And so it is....

Right. So it's been yonks since my last real update.......

The simple wrap up would be: Back in KL, landed and just finished a Malay drama shoot, filmed short pilot with Boss-man, helping out with G&W, been hanging out a lot with techno entrepreneurs and have finally come to realise that.....I'm no longer suited to hanging out with young'uns.

Or so I think. I think it really depends on the person. Give me someone wise beyond their years, and humble too please, and we'll get on just fine. I just called someone childish....and got a look in return that said..and you would be? Which is true most of the time.......Oh I don't know. I jus suddenly feel wuite rotten for saying it......gawd knows....I am rotten tho. I mean don't get me wrong, I've got a mean rotten streak in me no questions about it. I suppose Chuck's not the only one in need of a "Beware my inner be-yatch" tee shirt.......